After all, what's the internet for?

Surely, everyone has an opinion on pornography. The word 'porno' conjures images of blonde bouffants, cringe-inducingly long, fake fingernails inserted - no, not there! - and really tan dudes with no pubic hair. But porn in the 00s is making bold moves beyond the mainstream into territory that - I'm just going to say it - I really like.

The thing I never used to like about porn was the unreality of it. It's not a good unreal, either - it's the kind of unreal that encouraged a past boyfriend to think that coming on the boobs on a first sexual encounter was normal - nay, expected! Mainstream porn presents a fictionalised version of sex that intimidates members (haha) of both genders. Dudes are never going to come that much, on demand, or be that enthusiastic for that long. Ladies don't usually have spherical breasticals or love having those nasty nails in various orifices, and most don't have the vocal chords or stamina to make those noises. Then there are the serious ethical concerns about how women get into the industry and are treated once they are there. Guys are conditioned to like it, because that's all they're exposed to, but it contributes to warped ideas about sex, sexuality, and how each gender should be and interact.

Or should I say, it used to be all they're exposed to. Now, popular porn has progressed into the exciting realm of sites like YouPorn and RedTube, where a majority of material is user-created. That is, pornography, made for free, by real people, who enjoy being in porn. It's real people having real sex, with people they know and like. Ladies and gents, this is what porno should be about. Essentially: Here I am, having fun (on my own, with a gentleman/lady, etc.). Maybe you can have fun, too?

Then there are sites like AbbyWinters.com, a huge step in the direction of women-friendly porn. The ladies at AbbyWinters are there because they want to get nude in front of a camera. They are shot in their own homes, their own clothes and underwear, with no makeup, and their own boobs. They smile! They giggle and look nervous sometimes. They have fun. That is so hot. That is so great. That is so far from mainstream porno.

As someone of the female persuasion, it's really encouraging to see sites like AbbyWinters, and how popular they are. Not only does it provide real women for guys to sexually adore rather than articulated blow-up dolls, it allows girls and women to see other girls and women in a sexual way that is free from prejudice or guilt, and encourages them to see themselves the same way. They don't necessarily have to follow in the footsteps of the Abby models, but just seeing happy, healthy, naked girls who seem just like you does wonders for self-esteem and sexual confidence.

Because really, sex is universal. Everyone does it (except for the very small percentage of the population who are asexual, and that's a different story). Everyone thinks about it. Everyone's got preferences, kinks and desires they want fulfilled, but who talks about it? Now I feel like our generation, with the generous help of The Internet, is dragging Sex into the light and saying, Look, it's okay! We're blogging about it. We're discussing it in online communities, around cafe tables and in lectures. We're totally disregarding those god-awful Cosmo sex tips. Women especially are becoming more vocal about what they enjoy in porn (boys kissing!) and what they don't (stank-ass nails!), and finding participating in it exceptionally liberating. The 'niche' market of kink, amateur and fetish porn is becoming the mainstream. Though it might not feel like it, attitudes towards sex in general and porn in particular are relaxing. We're reinventing porn, from the shady misogynistic dealings of our parents' generation, into something friendly, feminist, and acceptable. Which is what it should be, shouldn't it?

Want more? (you naughty things, you):

Fleshbot.com - a dearly beloved news-style blog covering All Things Porno, amateur, pro, gay and straight, as well as this appropriate article;
MyBestFriendPorn.com - a guy and a girl reviewing everything sexy that comes their way;
Sex Tips - everyone needs 'em sometimes;
Literotica.com - for some good old fashioned erotic fiction;
Of course, The Internet Is For Porn;
BeautifulAgony.com - the hottest porn phenomenon ever?
I Shot Myself - sexy ladies photographing themselves;
For The Girls - hot boys? Yes please!

...And the amazing, inspiring Violet Blue. I cannot recommend her highly enough. Follow her links. Take her advice. Worship her like the goddess she is.